I figured it was entirely possible that my habits have removed me from celebrating much of anything. One could never know how important something is to another without asking. I did not wish to be impolite or insensitive, as sometimes I tend to be.
[As often as she tends to be. Mandatory sensitivity training might be something worth putting on Beatrix's future schedule.]
Did you celebrate it? With that fellow you were speaking of before on the beach? Your... paramour, I take it.
[ Susato sees that word and cannot help but become flustered at the implication. So much so that she starts to voice her objections aloud, and nearly does so onto the page. Simply 'lover' would have made more sense, though that probably would have flustered her, too. A stray mark will appear before Susato gets a handle on herself, taking a breath. ]
If you mean Kazuma, yes... It has also been one year since we opened the Harvest together, so that was yet another reason to celebrate.
[It is not the first time that Beatrix's word choice has affected someone in another way. In fact, when she said something of the same regarding Eustace and his relationship with Tifa, he had rather quite the good laugh over it. She can't possibly know the effect she's had on Susato with this, but...
She wouldn't be surprised.]
Ah, yes. That was the man I was speaking of. I am pleased that you have someone here you are so close to. Someone you can rely on in such a way. Were you already not so entwined with one another, I would take it upon myself to judge his worthiness.
[That is to say, Beatrix cares for Susato to such an extent that she treats her a bit the way one might treat a younger sibling.]
Edited (a 't' where it should have been) 2023-02-08 02:39 (UTC)
[ ......Perhaps it is something to inquire her about in person.
For now, she seems sufficient to let that little "misunderstanding" go. It takes her a moment before she knows how to respond, because she has always thought about how she can prove her worth and usefulness to him, and never the other way around. ]
He is as fortunate to have you, Lady Susato. These things are not so simply one-sided. I would like it if you thought more of yourself.
[But then, it's not as though Beatrix doesn't feel the same way. If their roles were reversed, she would be doing the same thing. Even in this case, she would say she is nothing short of blessed. She can suspect that to have a relationship with Susato would be considerably easier than any relationship held with Beatrix of Alexandria.]
[ ...That may be so. But there are still many interesting secrets to learn about General Beatrix of Alexandria... and while Susato values her privacy, she is far more of an open book by comparison. She wonders whether Beatrix would agree, but either way, it feels like a conversation they should continue in person.
[It is likely not an easy thing to hear. Such things rarely are. If Beatrix were younger, less experienced, she might press more. But if the roles were reversed, she would struggle with the same. And sometimes already, she suspects she pushes on Susato too hard. Delicacy never has been Beatrix's forte.]
My residence. I had a thought to patrol and see what has changed in my slumber. However, if you are in need of something, surely you know, you need only say as much to me. There is very little I would not do for you.
[Of course she wouldn't. Beatrix would wager Susato's not likely to ask anything of her. Not because she doesn't trust Alexandria's general, but rather Beatrix suspects she might perceive it as an imposition of some kind. Even with Beatrix's very reassuring input.]
You are always welcome to join me. I daresay your companionship will make it far more interesting. Otherwise, it merely would have been routine.
Just bring yourself. I cannot imagine what else you might consider bringing along. Truthfully, the patrols tend to be mostly dull. I doubt you shall see anything more interesting than myself.
She wonders if she should also bring a snack. Perhaps Beatrix is hungry after her slumber? Is she thirsty? ...Ah, but these are just natural thoughts that come from working at a restaurant, and she'd rather not overwhelm the General.
...In the end, Susato simply replies in the affirmative, and brings herself--exactly as Beatrix requests.
There is a knock on the Beatrix's door some time afterward, and as she stands patiently, her gaze starts to wander, looking for anything that might strike her as different since she was here last. ]
[Beatrix doesn't make her wait long. Her little abode is almost constantly overgrown with roses, which seems to continue indicating just how closed off Beatrix oft feels about herself as a person and her relationship with others. Boco, the yellow-plumed chocobo that once belonged to Zidane, occasionally enjoys pruning them (which is just a meal for him), and whether he notices Susato or not, he doesn't bother her.
When she answers her door, she's pulling a brush through the ends of her hair with some care.
Dohalim never really seems to leave a noticeable trace of himself behind, though he certainly spends enough time at her place to have an impression made. Or maybe that's all emotional marking rather than physical. It certainly feels like he is making his own little place there.]
Give me a few more moments, if you would. [She begins with some care.] Can I get you anything?
[A strange thing for her to ask, considering she was the one who was sleeping for a month. Just like Beatrix, though. Always focused on everyone else. So rarely outwardly focused on herself.]
[ Susato is not certain what to expect when Beatrix answers the door, but it is not so surprising that she is not quite ready yet. Her own hair has given her fair of trouble in the mornings, after all, so she smiles politely and walks in with a light shake of her head. ]
No, that's alright.
[ Of course not, though she understands the want to be a good host. ]
[At Susato's question, Beatrix turns to give her entryway another look with some deep consideration. Her treehouse interior is comfortable. Luxurious, even, which comes as no surprise when one considers she came from a castle of all things. For all Beatrix tries to separate herself from the noble class, she has certainly spent at least ten years benefiting from that higher station of life.
Looking back to Susato, she looses a sigh, finishing with her hair before setting down her brush.]
It seems like it for the most part? It is a bit tidier, which I suppose would happen with Dohalim here. Possibly. Or anyone else who came in whilst I was in slumber. I think some of my things were moved. I cannot tell if there is anything missing or added yet. I do not think so...? I will have to take a clearer inventory later.
[That's right. She sure does take a regular inventory after what happened the first time she wound up sleeping.]
[ When Beatrix starts to look around, so does Susato. It certainly does seem more luxurious than she is used to, but she thinks nothing of it. Dohalim seems to have done an excellent job of keeping it tidy, as she presumes Beatrix likes it. ]
Please let me know if I can help. For now... um...
[ She doesn't really know if there's a nice way to breach the subject, so she'll just kind of... do it. ]
Have you already seen Ori's letter? [ Does she know? Has she been to the grove? Let's just say Susato has not yet seen Beatrix's open message yet, if it has happened. ]
[The very mention of the name makes the pause that Beatrix falls into feel and appear quite transparent.
Yes. Of course she knows. She knows far more than she wishes she did. In fact, she wishes she'd never gotten Oriphi's letter. She wishes she could pretend it never existed, that she hasn't read it countless times prior to her slumber. That it hasn't touched her in the way that it has.
Clearing her throat, Beatrix lifts her hands to haughtily flick her hair back, as if that somehow might piece whatever's remaining of her dignity back together.]
I am aware of the one that was left for me. I heard that Beat also got one. It would seem she left letters for all of us.
[And the thought of that makes Beatrix ache all over again, the familiar tightness of her chest returning.]
[ Susato can practically feel the temperature drop, though the woman remains ever civil. All that tells Susato all she needs to know, and after a deep breath, she lets out a sigh that comes out a little shaky. ]
Yes, it would seem so. [ Susato included. ] My apologies, I didn't know if...
[Oriphi enters a conversation and it's almost surprising in self-reflection how abruptly Beatrix wants to shut it down. She doesn't, of course. She can't forget the contents of her own letter. The expectations that Oriphi placed upon her, even in the face of Beatrix's uncertainties.
When she hears what Susato has to say, Beatrix looks over to her and simply settles on the words with some consideration. Of course.
"She has tasked me with making sure that no one loses heart."
Is that the real reason Susato is here? Isn't that a good reason? She feels like she'll be crushed by the unbearable weight of reality. Drawing in a breath, she holds onto it, keeping herself together. Measured. Moving towards her doorway, she gestures for Susato to come with.]
I see. [She begins, still trying to figure out how to put everything.] You would be a good person for that. How are you finding your charge? Appropriate?
[ Taking one last look around, Susato follows Beatrix when she gestures, like an obedient assistant. It's not the only reason she's here; she is also here for Beatrix's sake, though she wonders for a moment if the General took that poorly. ]
...It's difficult.
[ She admits, speaking softly. ]
But focusing on the task has kept me from losing heart myself, so I suppose she got her wish, in a way. [ That's deserving of a smile, isn't it? Susato tries, at any rate. See, Ori...?
[She waits patiently, letting Susato go first and only when she has does Beatrix shut the door to her treehouse.
'Difficult' is a good way to put it. It certainly feels like a monumental task. Hard to work through. Hard to understand. Hard to piece together. Hard to work through. Hard, when one may be afraid that they may not meet those expectations. Oriphi may not be here in the flesh any longer, but it certainly feels as if she is.
Perhaps that is merely the weight of expectation.]
That is an interesting way to put it. Not that I feel Oriphi was cunning enough to plan it that way. It is likely an unintended side effect. Yet an effective one all the same. I suppose that may hold true for many of us and the requests that she made of us.
[ Susato gives a quiet nod as they walk, and goes out of her way to remain behind Beatrix. It is humbling to realize the same could happen to any one of them at any moment. Such is why Eustace's quest to stay here permanently is so important to many, though Susato herself is still unable to abandon her homeland completely.
She bites at her lip, feeling like Beatrix has opened a door with the mention of those requests. ]
[Beatrix doesn't respond immediately, though it doesn't seem because she has no intention to do so. On the contrary, she's simply thinking about how she wants to reply. In the end, she decides that simple and straight forward is the best way to address it, regardless of her feelings on the matter.]
She asked that I protect the rest of you. I think... she always wanted to learn better how to protect us. Not that she could not already. I think she just wanted to improve. You know, she asked me before she left to train her with my sword, so I made her a replica of it and we practised together.
[Beatrix settles on that for some moments, shaking her head.]
I always thought she was too delicate to wield such a thing. I underestimated her a lot. As I do with most of the people here.
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I figured it was entirely possible that my habits have removed me from celebrating much of anything. One could never know how important something is to another without asking. I did not wish to be impolite or insensitive, as sometimes I tend to be.
[As often as she tends to be. Mandatory sensitivity training might be something worth putting on Beatrix's future schedule.]
Did you celebrate it? With that fellow you were speaking of before on the beach? Your... paramour, I take it.
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[ Susato sees that word and cannot help but become flustered at the implication. So much so that she starts to voice her objections aloud, and nearly does so onto the page. Simply 'lover' would have made more sense, though that probably would have flustered her, too. A stray mark will appear before Susato gets a handle on herself, taking a breath. ]
If you mean Kazuma, yes... It has also been one year since we opened the Harvest together, so that was yet another reason to celebrate.
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She wouldn't be surprised.]
Ah, yes. That was the man I was speaking of. I am pleased that you have someone here you are so close to. Someone you can rely on in such a way. Were you already not so entwined with one another, I would take it upon myself to judge his worthiness.
[That is to say, Beatrix cares for Susato to such an extent that she treats her a bit the way one might treat a younger sibling.]
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For now, she seems sufficient to let that little "misunderstanding" go. It takes her a moment before she knows how to respond, because she has always thought about how she can prove her worth and usefulness to him, and never the other way around. ]
He is a good man. I promise.
I am quite lucky.
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[But then, it's not as though Beatrix doesn't feel the same way. If their roles were reversed, she would be doing the same thing. Even in this case, she would say she is nothing short of blessed. She can suspect that to have a relationship with Susato would be considerably easier than any relationship held with Beatrix of Alexandria.]
1/2
There is a pause before she responds, ]
Thank you — I will.
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Where are you at the moment?
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My residence. I had a thought to patrol and see what has changed in my slumber. However, if you are in need of something, surely you know, you need only say as much to me. There is very little I would not do for you.
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I wouldn't ask you to go out of your way for me. But I would not mind joining you on your patrol if you would have me.
[ There are some things she is bound to know about already, but it feels like they have much to discuss. ]
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You are always welcome to join me. I daresay your companionship will make it far more interesting. Otherwise, it merely would have been routine.
[And routine usually means boring.]
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I'll come straight away then. Shall I bring anything?
[ She knows the town pretty well by now, but she still doesn't quite know what to expect and what Beatrix might usually encounter. ]
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She wonders if she should also bring a snack. Perhaps Beatrix is hungry after her slumber? Is she thirsty? ...Ah, but these are just natural thoughts that come from working at a restaurant, and she'd rather not overwhelm the General.
...In the end, Susato simply replies in the affirmative, and brings herself--exactly as Beatrix requests.
There is a knock on the Beatrix's door some time afterward, and as she stands patiently, her gaze starts to wander, looking for anything that might strike her as different since she was here last. ]
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When she answers her door, she's pulling a brush through the ends of her hair with some care.
Dohalim never really seems to leave a noticeable trace of himself behind, though he certainly spends enough time at her place to have an impression made. Or maybe that's all emotional marking rather than physical. It certainly feels like he is making his own little place there.]
Give me a few more moments, if you would. [She begins with some care.] Can I get you anything?
[A strange thing for her to ask, considering she was the one who was sleeping for a month. Just like Beatrix, though. Always focused on everyone else. So rarely outwardly focused on herself.]
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No, that's alright.
[ Of course not, though she understands the want to be a good host. ]
Is everything as you remember it?
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Looking back to Susato, she looses a sigh, finishing with her hair before setting down her brush.]
It seems like it for the most part? It is a bit tidier, which I suppose would happen with Dohalim here. Possibly. Or anyone else who came in whilst I was in slumber. I think some of my things were moved. I cannot tell if there is anything missing or added yet. I do not think so...? I will have to take a clearer inventory later.
[That's right. She sure does take a regular inventory after what happened the first time she wound up sleeping.]
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Please let me know if I can help. For now... um...
[ She doesn't really know if there's a nice way to breach the subject, so she'll just kind of... do it. ]
Have you already seen Ori's letter? [ Does she know? Has she been to the grove? Let's just say Susato has not yet seen Beatrix's open message yet, if it has happened. ]
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Yes. Of course she knows. She knows far more than she wishes she did. In fact, she wishes she'd never gotten Oriphi's letter. She wishes she could pretend it never existed, that she hasn't read it countless times prior to her slumber. That it hasn't touched her in the way that it has.
Clearing her throat, Beatrix lifts her hands to haughtily flick her hair back, as if that somehow might piece whatever's remaining of her dignity back together.]
I am aware of the one that was left for me. I heard that Beat also got one. It would seem she left letters for all of us.
[And the thought of that makes Beatrix ache all over again, the familiar tightness of her chest returning.]
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Yes, it would seem so. [ Susato included. ] My apologies, I didn't know if...
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She has tasked me with making sure that no one loses heart.
[ So.......here she is. ]
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When she hears what Susato has to say, Beatrix looks over to her and simply settles on the words with some consideration. Of course.
"She has tasked me with making sure that no one loses heart."
Is that the real reason Susato is here? Isn't that a good reason? She feels like she'll be crushed by the unbearable weight of reality. Drawing in a breath, she holds onto it, keeping herself together. Measured. Moving towards her doorway, she gestures for Susato to come with.]
I see. [She begins, still trying to figure out how to put everything.] You would be a good person for that. How are you finding your charge? Appropriate?
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...It's difficult.
[ She admits, speaking softly. ]
But focusing on the task has kept me from losing heart myself, so I suppose she got her wish, in a way. [ That's deserving of a smile, isn't it? Susato tries, at any rate. See, Ori...?
She can do this. ]
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'Difficult' is a good way to put it. It certainly feels like a monumental task. Hard to work through. Hard to understand. Hard to piece together. Hard to work through. Hard, when one may be afraid that they may not meet those expectations. Oriphi may not be here in the flesh any longer, but it certainly feels as if she is.
Perhaps that is merely the weight of expectation.]
That is an interesting way to put it. Not that I feel Oriphi was cunning enough to plan it that way. It is likely an unintended side effect. Yet an effective one all the same. I suppose that may hold true for many of us and the requests that she made of us.
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She bites at her lip, feeling like Beatrix has opened a door with the mention of those requests. ]
May I ask what she requested of you?
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She asked that I protect the rest of you. I think... she always wanted to learn better how to protect us. Not that she could not already. I think she just wanted to improve. You know, she asked me before she left to train her with my sword, so I made her a replica of it and we practised together.
[Beatrix settles on that for some moments, shaking her head.]
I always thought she was too delicate to wield such a thing. I underestimated her a lot. As I do with most of the people here.
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